my mom is scREAMING downstairs right now about how there’s no chocolate.
“How can we NOT HAVE CHOCOLATE IN THIS HOUSE?”
“How is there NO CHOCOLATE???”
“DO YOU MEAN TO TELL ME THAT WE HAVE A WHALE HANGING FROM THE CEILING BUT THERE’S NO CHOCOLATE?”
Wait, why have you got a whale hanging from your ceiling?
HAVE YOU EVER STIRRED THE CREAM IN WITH A LONE TEASPOON
OR ASKED THE STEAMING KETTLE WHY HE STEAMS
CAN YOU DRINK WITH ALL POSHNESS OF THE BRITISH
CAN YOU PAINT WITH ALL THE COLORS OF THE TEA
CAN YOU PAINT WITH ALL THE COLORS OF THE TEEEEEAAAAAAAAA
YOU THINK THE ONLY TEA CUPS WHO ARE TEA CUPS
ARE THE TEA CUPS WHO HOLD A DEEP DARK BREW
BUT IF YOU DRINK LIGHT ORANGE TEA OF STRANGERS
YOU’LL TASTE THINGS YOU NEVER KNEW YOU NEVER KNEW
HOW DARK CAN THE ORANGE PEKOE GROW
IF YOU POUR IT NOW, YOU WILL NEVER KNOW
AND YOU’LL NEVER STIR THE CREAM IN WITH A LONE TEASPOON
FOR WHETHER WE LIKE BLACK, OR HERBAL GREEN
WE MUST DRINK WITH ALL THE POSHNESS OF THE BRITISH
WE MUST PAINT WITH ALL THE COLOURS OF THE TEA
YOU CAN OWN THE LEAVES AND STILL
ALL YOU’LL OWN IS LEAVES UNTIL
YOU CAN PAINT WITH ALL THE COLOURS OF THE TEA
what just happened here
(via gigglingbean)Tags: #LOL
I hate it when people say “Fuck the police”.
Don’t just fuck the police.
Take the police out on a couple dates. Take the police to the movies or a nice stroll in the park. Feed the police some delicious fondue. Make the police fall in love with you. Then, fuck the police. And then out of nowhere, stop taking calls from the police. Ignore the police. Make the police miss you. Make the police cry.
I hate being in cars with boys they always roll down the windows and my hair is like pulling a medusa satanic ritual they don’t even care about my feelings
Shes got the best of both worlds!Tags: #LOL #funny #hannah montana #miley cyrus #olympics
Raise your hand if you have ever felt personally victimised by Regina George.Tags: #LOL #olympics #funny #regina #george